Understanding God’s Marriage Law’s
Understanding what God says about marriage and the covenant promise you made to Him, will help you understand why God will heal your broken marriage.
Your marriage is Utmost Important to God. Why? Because when you united in the matrimony of marriage, the two of you united into one with God. God created marriage in Genesis 2:23-24 “Then Adam said, This [creature] is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of a man. Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and shall become united and cleave to his wife, and they shall become one flesh”. God created man then made woman to complement and help him. Marriage is God’s greatest blessing so that man not be alone. “Now the Lord God said, It is not good (sufficient, satisfactory) that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper meet (suitable, adapted, complementary) for him.” (Genesis 2:18).
God joined the two of you together and brought it into fruition and said, “it is good” “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder (separate)”. When you married you were joined together (bound) for life, this is God’s law. When we seek to separate or divorce we are rebelling against God’s law.
“Beloved, man, no man, whether civil or religious, has the right to dissolve a marriage (only God can dissolve the marriage bond) on grounds other than what God has expressly said”! (Rev. 22: 18, 19). The only grounds for divorce, as it clearly says in the Matthew 19:9 and Matthew 5:31, 32 is fornication. God hates divorce, thus for no other reason than fornication will He allow divorce…not for indifferences, falling out of love, bitterness, anger, hate, a hardened heart. There are consequences for rebelling against God’s laws.
Most divorce arise from a hardened heart. A hardened heart is a unforgiving heart, and a unforgiving heart is a sinful heart, God does not honor sin of any kind, He hates sin, and whoever lives in sin is not of God, is not living for God, honoring God, walking with God, obeying Gods laws and commands, and is living in death, heading for the pit of hell. It is what it is, and there is no way around it.
People are incessantly attempting to side track or go around what God has said, marriage is no exception. It is the height of folly for man to believe he can arbitrarily annul or divorce what God has established.
According to Jesus, marriage is much more than an ‘agreement,’ even more than what we would call a ‘contract.’ Marriage is a God-made covenant.
When you married you made a solemn vow to God, a promise that cannot be broken, “I take thee to be my lawfully wedded (wife/husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; and I promise to be faithful to you until death parts us”. This vow was a covenant promise you made to God, and there is nowhere in the bible that allows us to annull or divorce that promise. God insists that you keep all of your solemn promises.
The Bible clearly states that it is better not to make solemn promises. To make a promise to God and not keep it is the work of a fool; such a thing leads to God’s anger and judgment. If you love God, you will keep all of your promises to Him.
“When you make a vow to God, do not delay in fulfilling it. He has no pleasure in fools; fulfill your vow”. (Ecclesiastes 5:4-7).
Think back upon the day you married. You looked deep within your bride/groom’s eyes with a love to be cherished, then vowed to God that until death do you part, that you would remain in the bond of marriage, regardless of the circumstances. You promised that to God, and you believed what you said at the time when you said it. It seemed so simple. So much love was streaming from your heart, that you just knew nothing could separate that binding convenant.
But there are tribulations in the world, and since satan attacks love more than any other thing, (especially if you’re a Christian) your marriage went into turmoil and that promise you made to God was broken.
As was said before, God hates divorce (Malachi 2:16) and never intends for a couple to separate once they are married. Because separation, whether it is legal or physical, involves the division of a married couple, it displeases and hurts God. First Corinthians 7:10-11 says, “A wife must not leave her husband. But if she does leave him, let her remain single or else go back to him. And the husband must not leave his wife.”
Marriage vows should not be taken lightly, and separation should never be done casually or out of anger, because you’ll drift farther apart until you eventually divorce. This is not in God’s perfect plan for marriage, even if it has become acceptable in the world. “Live joyfully with the wife whom you love all the days of your vain life which He has given you under the sun–all the days of futility. For that is your portion in this life and in your work at which you toil under the sun.” (Ecclesiastes 9:9).
Now since you know how God feels about marriage, will give you a greater understanding on why He heals broken marriages, regardless of the circumstances. There is not a marriage He will not heal…no marriage He cannot restore.
A Marriage Disaster
8 months ago I met the man of my dreams. Someone I prayed to God for 15 years. I met him through my best friend after his wife had died. We had so much in common and fell madly in love, with the love of God. We married after knowing each other for only 4 months and it was obvious to everyone, even ourselves, that it was a marriage sent from heaven. The promise that God had given me, “God can do exceedingly, and abundantly, above and beyond more than we could ever ask, think or imagine”, had come true. I was in heavenly bliss. Yes, it was much more than I could have ever imagined.
Then the initial tribulation came 3 months later. I had a lifestyle that he agreed he could handle before we married. I went out 2 to 3 days a week for dinner and a couple of drinks, and had been doing so for the 15 years of my single life. When I met my husband it was so romantic at first, that I wanted the evenings never to end, so I had an extra drink seeking to keep the romance alive. He, on the other hand, became frightened and asked if I would slow down, but I on the other had did not want too.
Then one evening all hell broke loose, he packed up and went back to his home town, about 8 hours away. I called him seeking to reconcile, but to no avail. I could hear in his voice, that he had hardened his heart against me.
The next morning I awoke and was devistated. I could not believe this was happening. So I prayed, “please God, bring him back home,” but my prayer seemed to go unheard. The next days were a nightmare. I cried, then I was angry, then with prayer I would seem to be okay for awhile. Again I filled with pain, then became angry, and again I felt okay. This roller coaster ride went on it seems for eternity. He didn’t call which made me even more anxious and brow beaten, so I called him and asked him if he wanted a divorce. He asked me if I did and I said, “no, but if you do, I want to let you go free. Do you want one?”, and he said yes. Still I tried to reason with him, but again, no success.
I was panic stricken. He said he was done and nothing was going to change his mind. The evening he left I made a vow to God that I would change my lifestyle and never take a drink again, and my husband knew of that promise, but he had made his mind up, so I told him to go ahead and get the divorce. He went to an attorney to start proceedings.
A few days later I called my husband asked him to wait, that it had only been 2 weeks and I needed time. He said okay “instantly”. I asked him to forgive me, he said he did, and he put the divorce on hold. Understand this: Forgiveness does not necessarily mean that you take the person back. He did not want to go there, but he set me free, instead of holding me captive through unforgiveness.
Fighting For My Marriage
The first 10 years of my single life, before I married my former husband, I devoted my life to God. 10 to 20 hours a day prayed, read the bible and wrote. But the last 5 years I felt myself drifting away from God. God was in my life, and I talked to Him every morning and meditated on His word, but I quit reading the bible and going to church. I listened to sermons on TV, but I could feel the void. I did however, still have faith, not the powerful faith that I once had, but faith, and in all areas except for God healing a broken relationship. Until, I realized this was not just a relationship, this was a marriage created by my Almighty Father, a wonderful blessing that He sent from above. That turned my thinking around.
I made my mind up right then and there to seek out scriptures and what God actually said about marriage, and if He could really heal one…and by faith I knew there is nothing that is impossible for Him. Yes, He can heal marriages and even turn a hardened heart around. There is nothing He won’t do for those who love Him…He said it in His word. “The earnest (heartfelt, continued) prayer of a righteous man makes tremendous power available [dynamic in its working].” James 5:16.
I took a stand on faith and decided to fight for my marriage and not let satan kill, steal and destroy every blessing God had given me. I knew this stand on faith would take endurance and patience and a devout closeness to God.
Steps For A Healed Marriage
You can cry all day long and pray, but that’s not going to move God to work on your situation. He does hear your cry and undertand your needs, but that’s not faith and faith is what it takes for God to move that mountain out of your life. The need we have in our time of grief is to get the person we love back into our lives. We love him and miss him (or her) and it hurts, Oh God does it hurt. But God wants us to love and miss Him more than we miss our mate. He wants us to lean on Him, give Him our grief and let Him take care of it for us. He wants your love, your plea’s and to get out of His way.
You see, God wants a relationship with you, an intimate relationship. He wants to be number 1# in your life. “Love God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your might.” God first, your spouse second. When we’re weeping and crying praying to get our mate back, we’re putting our needs before God. You’ll know who you love most by who you think about most. When you’re praying for God to restore your marriage in your dire need, are you thinking about God, or yourself?
One of the wonderful things about God is, when you give your heart to God, He will not hurt it, He will heal it and make you better. He will heal your pain so you can think right about your situation…so you can pray right, love right, be right. If you don’t let go and let God, you’ll be right back in the same situation a few months from now, as you are today. Therefore, you will need to give your heart and all your cares to God and cast down anything that goes against His Word. Don’t believe it, cast it down, give it to God and let Him take care of the situation for you.
Once you establish a strong relationship with God, pray then be patient. QUIT WORRYING. Life has dealt you a blow, but you cannot sit around and worry all the time. God will take all your burdens and carry them for you. Unless, of course you enjoy fretting over every little thing that comes your way?
You need healing, so ask the Holy Spirit to rid of your anger, your fear, your anxieties. Ask God to remove everything that is keeping you from restoring your marriage. Give God all your burdens and let Him take care of them for you. Once you’ve given Him your burdens, quit trying to take them back. Trust in Him. Have faith that He will take care of all your needs, your problems, your trials, your emotional roller coaster ride. He wants to help you…All you have to do is ask. Ask, then,
LEAVE IT ALONE
“Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord”. Don’t wake up in the morning and say, “Well,! I’m feeling much stronger now, I think I can handle it from here.” Why do you think you are feeling stronger now? It’s simple. You gave God your burdens and He is taking care of them for you. He will renew your strength and cover you in His peace. If you take your problems back, you will be right back where you started. Leave them with Him and forget about them. Just let Him do His job.
TALK TO HIM
He wants you to forget a lot of things. Forget what was making you crazy. Forget the worry and the fretting because you know He is in control. But don’t forget to talk to Him often. He loves you. He wants to hear your voice. He wants you to include him in everything in your life. He wants to hear you talk about your friends, your family and the things you like best. Prayer is simply having a conversation with Him. He wants to be your best friend.
He sees a lot of things from up above that you cannot see from where you are. Have faith that He knows what He is doing. Trust Him. He will continue to care for you, watch over you, and meet your needs. You only have to trust Him. How hard can trust be?
Satan will say, “The marriage is over, he has hardened his heart against you. He is moving on with his life, and you are not included. You might as well get a divorce because you really messed up this time, and it’s too late now.”
But God says, “I can do exceedingly and abundantly above and beyond all that you can ask, think or imagine. Greater is He who is in you than he who is in the world, for I am in you. You can do all things through Christ because I will give you strength to overcome. Trust in Me, do not lean on your own understanding. I am smiling down on you right now. I CAN heal your marriage and will bring about a wonderful reconcilliation because I work all things together for the good. Be confident and patient and you will receive My favor in amazing ways. I am a BIG God, there is nothing to difficult for Me. You are blessed, you are victorious. I will open up doors that no man can shut. My blessings are running down on you now and they are overtaking you. I love you, I will take care of this situation for you. Stand strong in faith and trust Me, and get out of my way because I’m comming through, and I’m coming through in the Name of Jesus.”
Don’t listen to your emotions because they will lie to you. It doesn’t matter what it feels like or seems like at the time, God will heal your marriage, and He will heal it in His time, not yours. If your spouse has left you, don’t call him, don’t write him, don’t let him know how you feel. Let it go and let God. God will put the right person in his way to soften his heart and bring about a change. God will go into his heart and exchange it with His.
PRAY FOR YOUR HUSBAND/WIFE
As Christians we are not to bow out at the sign of defeat. Instead we are to confront the enemy and put on the full armor of God. If your husband/wife has left you and has hardened his heart, he is in danger of the eternal fire because he has gone against God’s word “What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder (separate)” and has broken his convenant promise. He has been deceived by the enemy.
However, if a man is ignorant of God’s laws and lives by the ways of the world, then finds God and gives his life to Him, he will be forgiven for everything he has done up until that time, and will not be held accountable. His sins will be washed away, cleansed, and God will not remember them anymore. But a person who knows God and is not ignorant, there is no excuse for what he does in sin. He will be judged and it won’t be pleasent, you can be assured of that. If we stand in prayer for them, God will shake them from their sin and save them once again.
Just trust God to heal your marriage because marriage healing is in the bible, the promises of God, that are crystal clear. He does not want you divorced, He wants you and your mate married for a lifetime, one man married to one woman for life, until death. He hates divorce (Malichi), so much that He says the one who would do such a cruel thing to their spouse is cut off from Him. He will not listen to their pleas for help. However, when you ask God to restore your marriage, you can trust that He sent help for the restoration the moment you asked. His word says so and He is not a man that He could lie.
Pray for God to breakdown the wall your spouse has built and the hardness of heart against you. “Now I will tell you what I am going to do to my vineyard: I will take away its hedge, and it will be destroyed; I will break down its wall, and it will be trampled.”
Pray a hedge of thornbushes around your spouse, cover him daily with the Full Armor of God. Plead the Blood of Jesus over your covenant husband or wife and all that has your name on it, and tell satan to get out of his mind, out of his body, out of his thoughts, out of his heart, in the Name of Jesus, Amen.
Pray this prayer daily until your marriage has been restored, Prayer For A Healed Marriage
I have put Husband or Him in the prayer. Replace it with Wife or her if need be.
Lord, deliver my husband from the power of darkness, and cause him to put on the armor of light. Help him in his daily walk to put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and Cause him to turn his eyes away from worthless things…to come to his senses, and escape the snare of the devil. Deliver him from immorality, strife, and envy, and draw him close to You, Father, with a true and contrite heart. Create in him a hunger and thirst for You and Your righteousness, and revive him in Your ways. I ask that You and fill him with the knowledge of Your will in all wisdom and spiritual understanding; that he might have a walk worthy of You, Lord, fully pleasing You, being fruitful in every good work,and increasing in the knowledge of You, strengthened with all might, according to Your glorious power.
Bring him into the calling that You have predestined for him; help him to serve You with a loyal heart and with a willing mind, and instruct him in the way he should go. Let him a be doer of the Word and not a hearer only, meditating in Your Word day and night. Establish his heart, so he will never be shaken, and show him a way of escape with every temptation. Let him owe no man anything except his love. A love that is in deed and truth, not just in word and speech. Let him be avolunteer serving You in the time of Your power. Seeking first Your kingdom so that he will reap abundant blessings.
I pray that he will honor You with his possessions and with the firstfruits of his increase; Praising the Lord with his whole heart in the assembly of the upright and in the congregation, walking humbly with You Lord, being determined to act justly, loving mercy and righteousness, being gracious and full of compassion.
PUT ON THE ARMOUR OF GOD so you can defeat the enemy demon.
Always Remember, THERE IS NOT A MARRIAGE God cannot heal….no marriage he cannot restore. Stamp that in your heart. All it takes is to believe what God said and have faith in His word. Nothing is too difficult for God. You need to persevere and believe Him. Take God at his word. God longs to restore marriages. but more than that he longs for you to KNOW HIM intimately Utmost! God wants a relationship with you. He wants you to receive His love and love Him in return. He wants you to receive His peace and joy so you can be a light to let others know what they can find in JESUS. Never give up believing God for your marriage healing. God is able and very willing to restore your marriage, because the day you said your vows, you covered it with His blood.
Read the scriptures on marriage, faith, and the Promises of God, so you will know what He can do for you in every area of your life. You will need to be healed before God will bring your loved one back into your life, because healed people heal people, hurting people hurt people. Read and meditate on God’s Recipe Via His Precious Promises On Healing
Read my free ebook Faith – Your Access To Success, because God Promises That He Will Do Mighty Things Through Your Faith. Renew your mind daily with these Scriptural Affirmations, and build on your faith by understanding and knowing The Healing Powers Of Jesus.
I urge you to go to Rejoice Marriage Ministeries and listen to their 5 minuet programs on God Heals Hurting Marriages and Fight For Your Marriage. Rejoice Marriage Ministries shares the good news that there is a better answer than divorce: Hear the good news that God Heals Hurting Marriages. They will show you how to Fight For Your Marriage.
How badly do you want your marriage restored? If you want it badly enough, with God you will get it. But it will take patience, faith, consistancy and time.
Has my marriage been restored? He said “Your Marriage Has Been Restored,” so I know it’s on its way. “Faith calls things that be not as thou they were.” Thank you Great and Gracious God, You are my Healer, My Comforter, My Protector, My Restorer, My Everything. Hallallujah!!! I glorify Your Name, You my Awesome God, the lover of my soul. I know that there is nothing you won’t do for me because I love you so.